The "High-Need" characteristics are:

INTENSE (cry more, demand immediate responses, feed/nurse voraciously), she cried for half an hour before she falls asleep everyday. Crying has become part of her routine. You should have seen the mid-wife's face when she saw her fighting at feeding time. "she's got short fuse" was her comment 

HYPERACTIVE (high energy level-not the disorder), thank God that's not ADD haha. Her stretches are "huge" and she stretches for a loonnnnnng time.

DRAINING (use up lots of parents' energy, exhausting to parent), YEP!

FEEDS FREQUENTLY (especially applicable to babies and nursing), the feeding every 3 hour routine sometimes don't work for her.

DEMANDING (of parents and their energy), that was what I said from day 1.

AWAKENS FREQUENTLY (needs less sleep, especially during the day), she sleeps around 40 minutes in good days.

UNSATISFIED (no matter what you do, it doesn't improve their fussiness), i've tried all the soothing method. It's no point to stick to one. Just be creative!

UNPREDICTABLE (including extreme mood swings), if you upset her in the morning, she'll be upset for the rest of the day

SUPERSENSITIVE (keenly aware of their environment, quickly overstimulated), she stares at everything at all times.

UNABLE TO PUT DOWN (especially when babies), absolutely!

UNCUDDLY (touch is overstimulating, or hates to be confined, but is cuddly), can't swaddle her, unless i use tapes..nah just kidding

NOT A SELF-SOOTHER (bonds to people, not objects), dummies don't work on her

SEPARATION-SENSITIVE ("velcro baby", doesn't like new people/places). err.....not sure yet

But the good news is, spirited babies are above average babies that require above average care from parents...and if nurtured well, they will grow up to be very creative, strong leaders and smart!! Sounds like Chol-Mel??? Wonder where she got it from?

 

 

 

I WISH I KNEW HOW HARD IT WOULD BE ...........

 

Not that I wouldn't want to give birth if I knew the challenges of motherhood. But if I knew the DETAILS of the challenges while I was pregnant, I'm sure I'll be more prepared! So mothers-to-be, get to know as much as you can but still expect the unexpected!!

 

The unexpected:

1. I knew I won't have much sleep once the babe's born, but I didn't QUANTIFY it, so I was not prepared, thus exhausted after the 1st 3 days. To quantify it, the cycle of feeding to changing diaper to putting her to sleep then back to feeding repeats every 3 hours 24 hours a day. ANd within each 3 hour cycle, only 1-2 hours was for her and me to sleep.

 

2. I thought I'd be pretty alright and Baby Blues weren't for me, but I was wrong. The lack of sleep, quick and unprepared transition from labour to motherhood, thoughts of "I don't know what to do and how to do it", changing status from a almost full time shepherd and leader to a full time stay-at-home mum. These just overloaded me. Afterall, I'm human and I need to release my emotions so...hahah the 1st few days I found myself easily teared. Apparently that's caused by the hormonal changes in the body too. Oh well, just like what wen an has always said, "you're melancholic!"

 

3. It's not easy to train the little babe to sleep on her own, worse still, I (and the others at home) have unknowingly created bad sleeping habits for her. Now she doesn't go to sleep without either someone rocking her or ME sleeping next to her...:((( So my advise is, learn how to train and start training on day 1. But the good news is it's never to late to start training her and she's now only 3 weeks so it should be ok. I pray for God to grant us success when we start the training next week....please intercede for us!!! please please~~ for the sake of the Kingdom of God. hahaha!!!

 

So, what really helps?

1. Stay focus on both God and the reality! God has been my best comforter ever since. He gave me the best assurance when I doubted my ability. He gave me peace when I was up alone in the middle of the night. He reminds me of the joy being a mother, just like the joy the Creator has when He sees His creations. And the reality is, these are all what the baby needs at this time and I can choose to be the best and be whole-hearted at it.

 

2. It's also good to have someone to talk and to cry to and haha...sorry wen an, you're the chosen one!

 

3. Depending on your personality, you might be happy to just stay at home 24/7 for the 1st month. But for me, I need to go out. What I miss the most was Christian fellowship so it was such a errr.....relief/release...I don't know..... to be able to go to church last Sun. I pray that I'll be able to take Elise there tomorrow as well.

 

OK..now for all of you that have just read this blog, just to affirm you that I'm fine and happy!!! hahaha. Motherhood is God's gift and you can enjoy it more when you're more prepared, spiritually, physically and mentally:)))